Let's play a game.
We all remember the Sesame Street segment, "One of these things is not like the other..." don't we? Well, here we go.
The topic is "comments I have received in the past 2 days while out with the kids..." Which comment "doesn't belong?"
1. "Wow. You are really big."
2. "You are about to have your hands full! Oh wait -- *notice the back seat of the stroller* -- you already have two?! Wow." *chuckle as you walk away*
3. "Wait...you already have a girl and a boy? And you're having another? Why?"
4. "Wow. (you have to say that with big eyes as you look at me and the kids, and then my stomach.) Wow."
5. "My sister and I were just talking about people who have 2 kids and go for a third. We were wondering who would ever do that, and why?!"
6. "Congratulations! Good for you. Thank you for bringing wonder and beauty into this increasingly disparaged world of ours. You go girl. You rock."
If you guessed number 6, you are a winner!
So really, answer me this: what is it about a pregnant woman that makes people feel like all social propriety is overrated? I surely don't go around calling people fat; or insulting their personal choices, regardless of how bizarre and/or foreign the choice may seem to me.
Honestly, its as if they see the 8 month pregnant lady with her 2 toddlers and think -- "Oooh! I'm going to go over there right now and insult her!" Because, more often than not, they have a smile on their face as these phrases come out. I don't know -- maybe they assume that I will join them in criticizing our family...?
All I know is that the next person who comments on my size or "situation" in the next 24 hours is likely to get an earful. And probably a bruise to the shin.
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17 comments:
Amen and LOL! I totally agree! People seem to lose all common sense with pregnant women! Especially at Walmart. Or they think they can touch your belly-that ones weird. And I think you should say something or kick them:) If you do.. you have to let me know:)You crack me up girl and you are beautiful in every way!Love ya!
p.s. I'd love to see some pics...
Totally ignore them. I know, I know, easier said than done. I don't know why people think they can say those kinds of things, but they do. Just remember whomever said #6 is right on. We are bringing beauty to the world and making it a better place. I can't wait to see your little beauty. :)
Bless you heart, Em. This is why I hate people. People are the worst. But I guess there's no escaping the commentary. Rob and I get harassed by our church friends all the time for NOT having children yet. What are we waiting for? Is it because we're too poor? Is it because I've decided my career is more important than I family? Is it because our equipment doesn't work? Is it because we don't have enough faith to follow the commandments?
It's because it's none of your business. That's why.
Hang in there.
We got those questions too--"you already have a girl and a boy...why..." so funny. Well Emily, I bet you look great and your kids are darling and I'm so excited for you! Way to be, awesome mama.
My first thought was Amen, too! I think some of it is the LA mentality. I get all kinds of comments when I go out with my three boys, most of them about how I must keep trying for that girl as if that's the only reason to have another and then they ask if we are done, but it isn't so much a question, rather a statement. And now I kind of love to say, oh, maybe after another two, just to see their reaction. :)
I am excited for you! Three can be chaos, but it is also the best kind! Wear it proud!
Ah yes. I love the "Wow, your hands are full" comment. It makes me want to say back, "Yes I do. So now you can help me through the store/out to my car/to our seats/etc.". The ONLY person who has offered to help me was the oldest lady I've ever seen. Bless her a million times! :). And I was asked if I was overdue or carrying twins almost every week by these two women at church. They have their own children and should have known better in my opinion.
I used to get so mad when they commented on my huge belly because girl I get HUGE! People would ask if I was having twins or going to pop 2 or 3 months before my due date. I would think to myself, "hey at least I'll be loosing my fat belly in a few months." Not kind thoughts, I know, but it does get annoying to hear it all the time and it made me smile to myself.
I think people don't realize that they're not the only ones commenting. That people comment on your belly and kids every time you leave the house. I feel for you Emily.
Oh so true! It's like, yes, I know I am big, I am 8 freaking months pregnant, for crying out loud! I am supposed to be big! But who made it your business to tell me?! Do people honestly not know not to say those type of things? Someone is liable to get punched around these parts, too, I'm afraid. ;-)
As a mom of 4 kids 4 and under, let me just warn you now that it doesn't stop after you have the baby!! I had this exact discussion with Scott. Why can't ONE person tell me what a great Mom I am, and how proud they are of me, INSTEAD of, "oooh, wow, you've got your hands full!!" with a tone that is clearly disapproving. I now smile and say, "yes, and we've got another on the way!!" (but I am inclined to add in the kick to the shins, now that you've mentioned it...)
We don't get that MUCH in Texas, but there are still people who give me looks (and I'm not even in the third trimester yet). I did get the 'boy, girl, why' commment. I want to be snarky and say because I enjoy sacrificing my body for nine+ months, I'm sadistic that way.
If we want to have more kids, then that's our business! Enjoy the rest of the pregnancy and when baby girl finally makes her debut!
Wow, sometimes people are so lame! I think you're fantastic for having more children and more power to ya! It really does depend on the city you're in, but I'm sorry you're getting so many rude comments! No fun at all.
Hey Emily! I feel for you, girl! I got that ALL. THE. TIME. After we had Sarah, the majority of people would say, "oh, you have a boy and a girl...now you can be done." Um, what? I hate to break it to you but, that's California living for you. It taught me to be extra careful about what I say to other people about any situation. It's also good to have a nice tidy response that leaves them speechless. Can't think of one at the moment but give me a bit and I'll have one! And, you are beautiful!
Geez. Thank's for venting. I want nothing more than to give you an earful of support and love in contrast to all that garbage! I can't believe it!
I think you are amazing and beautiful and you have an amazing and beautiful family. It's would be a pretty sad world if there weren't another Ames child coming--they turn out so well! You are my hero and I am so excited for your new baby!! And I know that baby is so excited to have you for a mom, Brian for a dad, and Charlie and Lucy as siblings. What a lucky kid!!
Haha, reading the other comments made me remember how mad my mom would get when there were six of us. We happened to be three boys and three girls, and people would call us the Brady Bunch when we went out shopping. My mom hated that, and I didn't understand why until later when I realized she was thinking, "Uh-uh, these are all my own kids. Don't you think they're not!"
I think part of it is where you live...here in Utah, when people ask how old Kiley is now, I say 3, they hound me on when I'm going to have another. This is on an almost daily basis. Very annoying. In California, you have too many... In Utah, you don't have enough? WTF?
I think part of it is where you live...here in Utah, when people ask how old Kiley is now, I say 3, they hound me on when I'm going to have another. This is on an almost daily basis. Very annoying. In California, you have too many... In Utah, you don't have enough? WTF?
There are still some considerate LA-inos. One of the funniest comments I got with my last pregnancy was in the elevator. "Oh!" the lady said, as I stepped in. "That's cute." I looked confused, so she gestured to my enormous belly. "That."
Weird, but at least positive, right?
And I had no idea you were expecting! Congrats, congrats - you go, girl.
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